But The Quest for Beauty is a Beast. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sick and Fall Pain filled my body. In no way could I get comfortable. Waves of nausea drifted through me. Beads of sweat rolled down my body. The lights seemed so far away and dim. The heat sweltering. I put a towel on the floor and took some Zofran. I fell into a light sleep. How much later do I wake up? I lean over and vomit on the towel. A thick wave of brown shoots out of me. Another follows. My body convulses and I suddenly feel very weak. "Mommie!" I scream. I scream it four times. She comes. I collapse back onto the pillow. "Oh Sweetie!" She says. She takes the towel away, full of food from 12 hours before. She brings me a wet washcloth. I fall back asleep. My last day should not have been like this. I was suppossed to see my friends. I was suppossed to go to my brother's concert. Instead I lay in bed, too weak to move, sweating, reaking of ketones, thirsty, having trouble drawing each breath. But I will get better. Tomorrow I will be in treatment. Tomorrow I will begin a new life. Just give me the strength to make it those 31 hours until then... 1:19 a.m. - 2004-04-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------- |
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