But The Quest for Beauty is a Beast. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wake Up Call I am asleep. The phone rings and I hear it drowsily. Suddenly my mom wakes me telling me that it is urgent. "Gwen, Jori is on the phone. She has to talk to you. She is hysterical. She is crying!" So I get on the phone. And yes my dear friend, who lived with me for months in my darkest days and was patient and kind, who took care of me is now in need. And she is thousands of miles away. "Gwen, I don't know what I would do without you. If you die I will kill myself. You have done so much for me. You are my best friend. I love you so much. And you are dying. Your diary makes me cry. I am a bitch for leaving you." "No you aren't," I say, "And I am okay. I will be fine." "But you have been sick for so long. And in so many hospitals. And we will never talk to each other again!" I am stunned. She bursts into tears. Where she is it is 2:00am. And then I realize what is the problem... "Jori, are you drunk?" And she is. She is ten miles from home with no ride in a strange area with lude men. This scares me. I am waiting for her to call me back. When she hangs up after I convince her to call her mom I remember another friend who promised never to abandon me. And I recently got the pics developed of us. I didn't have to call her. I could have just sent them. But I do call. "Hi, "Jen*, I know you probably don't want me to call, but I got the pics back. Do you want me to send them?" "Oh no, um I can't pick them up now, but what is easiest for you." "Okay, I am going to UCLA on Monday so I will send them." "Okay, bye." I don't know what I expected. We used to be so close. I wanted to ask her why, what I did. She said she would never leave me, she would always be my friend. And it hurts so bad. But I am selfish. I feel like I am going to vomit... And not intentionally. 11:03 p.m. - 2004-04-23 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------- |
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