But The Quest for Beauty is a Beast.

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Yes!

Another beautiful day in Santa Monica!
I went to visit the recreation therapist at UCLA to say hi and I was delighted with the fact that I can say I am doing well and happy. My sugars are under great control, ranging from 85 to 140 with a few highs and lows. I feel great.
Kyle and I walked around Westwood and bought an Angelina Jolie poster to decorate our living room. Afterwards we went to Costco and stocked up on the bare essentials. I love that I can walk in there and not shake with anticipation and desire for all the sugary high calorie sweets. In fact, the only time I seem to crave sweets is right before my period and with that knowledge it is easier to accept when I do load up on junk food.
It has been four months and eighteen days since I purged. I have no desire to. It isn't something I think about after every meal. I just want to be healthy, in shape, and to stop smoking.
I don't want to be normal, no... But I don't want to be ill any longer.
I better go to bed. I need to appear early tomorrow at financial aid and counseling.

1:11 AM - Monday, Jan. 23, 2006
12 comments

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dying - living