But The Quest for Beauty is a Beast.

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Tired

(Go to previous entry for pics)
On Saturday I am going to look at apartments. I am so tired, too tired to be excited. I'm scared to leave, to be alone in this state.
If I die no one will know... Thats what I've wanted and now I am scared.
I push the fear down. Its what I deserve.
I am so so tired...
Three days sleep. I feel like Rip Van Winkle. My sugars haven't been under 600 in days. Im subsisting on two units a day yet eating everything. Too lazy to throw up, too starved not to eat...
God I'm tired.

2:35 AM - Thursday, Aug. 04, 2005
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dying - living