But The Quest for Beauty is a Beast. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ramble I am bingeing as I type this. Whats new? I just threw up about an hour ago. Yea, I swore I wouldn't do that either. So far I have eaten five waffles, two pudding cups, one yogurt, two cups of chocolate covered caremel popcorn, a lick of Cool Whip, a bite of peanut butter, and one pop tart. On my binge two hours ago it was seven pop tarts, five pieces of pizza, five oreos, and whatever else was in my path of destruction. I did my usual ritual of lying around for a while before I puked. I talked to Tali. I cried on the phone to her about what the docs said. She told me she ate a whole box of chocolate Ex-lax. I am so worried about her. Today I took a few Metabolife and the combo of the Dulcolax, and puking just isn't serving me well. My mom says that I may have cost the NA that was pushing me around in the wheelchair her job. I feel like such a fuck up. I seriously didn't know, and neither did she. I really hope she gets to keep it. I don't really have anything to say... I am so sad lately. I am debating about whether to go purge now or go to bed and wake up feeling ill and then puke. Hmmm... decisions decisions... I think I will wait this one out. Goodnight everyone. Love Dimstar. 12:59 a.m. - 2003-02-11 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------- |
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