Comments:

scotvalkyrie - 2005-12-28 20:30:08
Gwen, your mother needs more help than you can give her. It would probably be in her best interest and yours to have her evaluated in a hospital setting. Please contact your doctor or therapist so that they can get you the resources you need. You do not have the strength to take care of yourself and your mother. You need your strength to take care of yourself. Please get her some help. XXX Bonnie
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~lita~ - 2005-12-28 20:51:32
Congratulations on your car! Even in this sad and confusing time, once you have your license, that car is always going to be immediate freedom -- you'll be able to go, to think, to make the good choices we all know you can make. *Hugs*
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J - 2005-12-29 00:09:10
Gwen, be safe. I am here if you want ... I am still proud, I still love you, I am still here...
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Silver80 - 2005-12-29 13:19:41
I know this probably isn't what you want to hear but I think your mother needs to be hospitalized. This is no way for either her or you to live. I can see this being something that drives you back into your eating disorder. If you don't want to hospitalize her can you look into in-home care. This just seems like it is to much for you to handle. I am so excited that you are getting your lisence. That is something I still need to do and I am 23. Good Luck! I'll be thinking of you. :)
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dana - 2005-12-29 19:01:15
love, i am sorry this is so hard. but its true, your mother needs to be in the hospital. you cant take care of her and you at the same time. please call someone, your doctor, therapist, lisa, barbie, 911, anyone. you cant do this on your own. it is not your fault, either. none of this is fair, and i wish i could take it all away. please, love, take care of yourself.
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Julia - 2005-12-29 20:52:30
The situation with your mom sounds like too much. She needs profesional help. That's great about getting a car! How'd you get that?
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Jen - 2005-12-30 03:06:34
Gwen.....I don't even know where to begin. I wish there was some other way to contact you or talk one on one but all contact info I had for you is lost. I am ashamed of myself for not being there for you this entire time. I knew about inpatient and planned on sending you a package....Regardless, this is not about me, Gwen, it's about you. You have always been in my thoughts and prayers. There is never a single instant when I think about you and am utterly humbled by who you are and what you've gone through. I could go on for ages...and I see that more crap has recently been added to the pile which has accumulated over your life. My faith, heart, and love for you will always be unfaltering. Please, PLEASE call me whenever you get a chance (626)818-4099. Love, Jen
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Kris - 2006-01-01 14:30:49
Gwen, I'm so sorry to hear about your mother -- it really does seem like she just got to this point out of nowhere from what you've written. I hope that you and your brother will be able to get her some help or care because it would just be too much for you to have to deal with on your own, in this current state or any. Have you talked to your aunt about it at all?? I don't remember how good of terms you were on with her, but maybe she could help you out a bit. Otherwise, I guess there are probably other resources. Bottom line though, you really should get out of there for now. I know your mother is important to you and all, but right now you also need to remember that your own health needs to be the number one priority. I'm sure your mother would want you to be healthy and, not only that, but if you get sick you won't be able to care for her either. You've come such a long way and you are such a strong person Gwen. Hopefully, you or your brother or some relative or friend can find your mother some outside help, and then you can be content knowing that she is getting help. Just do your best to stay strong throughout this all. I will keep you in my prayers as always, and I'll pray for your mother too. You can always feel free to e-mail me or IM me at anytime because I've stopped writing for now. I'm thinking I might make a come-back someday, but for now I've been pressed for time and I don't really know what to write anymore because there's just so much going on. However, I want you to know that I'm always here regardless of if I'm writing. Take care and stay strong! ~luvs~ XOXO
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Lisa - 2006-01-02 01:18:15
Goddess Gwennie! What is going on? Are you the only one helping your Mom? What about her guy friend, your brother, your aunt, the state?? She sounds like she qualifies for some assistance from the state, her doctors, and she should certainly be getting some help from her other relatives and friends (who may have more resources and less emotional involvement than you)... I'm not sure exactly what got her in the state you describe, but it could easily be a drug-induced psychosis (given her history of abusing pain killers...), which is quite scary to witness, but such conditions are usually treatable... In the meantime you NEED TO KNOW IN YOUR HEART that your Mom would absolutely want you to continue taking care of yourself, your diabetes and your recovery. If she gets too out of control you can call a P.E.T. team and have her put on a 51/50 hold (the psychiatric 3 day hold for people who are a threat for harm to themselves or others), and then you can be reassured that she would be evaluated at a psychiatric facility (which it sounds like she could really benefit from!). You can also call Social Services and have a social worker come to the house and evaluate the situation. I know those options are not your favorite things to do, but your Mom needs help that you and your brother cannot provide. And you may recall people interviening when you were in crisis with your eating disorder and though it wasn't fun, it was the right thing to do. You are in my heart, Gwen. Hang in there. I love you, Lisa
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Lisa - 2006-01-02 01:20:52
P.S. May the new year bring ALL OF YOU true HAPPINESS and secure health.
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